Thoughts Crushing Your Biggest Dreams

20 Tiny Thoughts Crushing

Your Biggest Dreams

It is ultimately only our own thoughts that hurt us.

The mind is your battleground.  It’s the place where the greatest conflict resides.  It’s where half of the things you thought were going to happen, never did happen.  But if you allow those thoughts to dwell in your mind, they will succeed in robbing you of peace, joy, and ultimately your life.  You will think yourself into a nervous breakdown, into depression, and into defeat.  I know because I’ve been there.

What can be done?  To start, say this to yourself every morning when you first wake up:

“I’m letting go of all the negative feelings, fears and thoughts from yesterday.  I have no room for them!  I will focus only on positive thoughts and resolutions today.”

And then practice what you preach.  It will gradually make a difference in your life, guaranteed.

Because truthfully, there is so much about your fate that you can’t control, it makes no sense to neglect all the things you CAN control.  You can decide how you spend your time, whom you socialize with, whom you share your life, money and energy with.  You can pick your words and the tone of voice in which you speak to others.  You can select what you will eat, read and study every day.  You can choose how you’re going to respond to unfortunate situations when they arise, and whether you will see them as curses or opportunities for growth…

And most importantly, you can choose your thoughts, which dictate pretty much everything else.

Train your mind to see the good in everything.  Positivity is a choice.  The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.

In other words, you are what you think.  You can’t change anything if you can’t change your thinking.

Here are twenty thoughts it’s time to change:

1. “My dreams and goals can wait.” – Live a life you are proud of.  In the end, your greatest fear should not be of failure, but of succeeding at things that don’t matter to you.  We never tell ourselves that we will never live our dreams.  Instead we just keep talking about how we will start living our dreams tomorrow.
2. “I don’t have time.” – Bottom line: “I don’t have time,” is really just another, perhaps politer, or perhaps naive, way of saying, “It’s not that important to me.”
3. “I’m not talented enough.” – Learn the value of work and practice – just the repeated concerted effort to get better at things.  Forget the notions of talent and genius.  I can hear you thinking, “Oh, these other people, they just have something that I don’t have.”  When really, they are just people who work and practice more.  Understand this.  Work and practice are the keys to anything you want to do.  If you want to play the guitar – anybody can learn to play the guitar – you can be good at it.  Maybe you won’t be Jimi Hendrix, but you could be really good.  You can be good enough to write good songs or make music with others or whatever.  There’s no such thing as not having enough talent to get to that level.  Because persistence is talent, really.  Just sticking with it.  Talent is not stopping.  (Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.)
4.  “This problem is too big to solve.” – The problem is not the problem.  The problem is the incredible amount of over-thinking you’re doing with the problem.  Let it go and be free.
5. “I’m not ready yet.” – The truth is nobody ever feels ready when an opportunity arises.  Because great opportunities in life force us to grow emotionally and intellectually.  They force us to stretch ourselves and our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel comfortable at first.  And when we don’t feel comfortable, we don’t feel ready.  But that doesn’t change the fact that sometimes the course of our lives depends on what we do or don’t do in a few seconds, a heartbeat, when we either seize an opportunity, or just miss it.  Miss the moment and you may never get a chance again.  So in case you never get a second chance, don’t be afraid!  And what if you do get a second chance?  Take it!  It’s as simple as that.
6. “I knew I wasn’t good enough.” – Your struggle is part of your story.  Being rejected from something you want often means you are being directed toward something you need.
7. “I’m a failure.” – Not trying is failing.  Everything else is just practice.  It’s OK if you mess up, that’s how you get wiser.  Give yourself a break.  And don’t give up!  Good things take time, and you’re getting there, one step at a time.
8. “I just want everything to be easy.” – In every adversity there is a message.  Struggles and crises are nature’s way of forcing change – breaking down old structures, shaking loose negative habits so that something new and better can grow in their place.  So remember, just because you are struggling does NOT mean you are failing.  Every great success requires some kind of struggle to get there.  (Angel and I discuss this in more detail in the “Adversity” chapter of “1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.”)
9.  “They have it so much easier than me.” – No one has it easier than you.  Every one of us is fighting our own private battles.  The strongest among us aren’t those who show the strength we can see, but those who have won incredible inner battles we know nothing about.
10. “I have nothing to be thankful for.” – Choose positivity today.  If you’re struggling to be thankful for what you have, think for a moment and be thankful for what you’ve escaped.  Honestly, it doesn’t really matter if your glass is half empty or half full.  Be thankful that you have a glass and that there’s something in it.
11. “I have too many flaws.” – Wrong.  When you’re comfortable in your skin, even your flaws look beautiful.  And once you’ve embraced your flaws, no one can use them against you.
12. “They don’t have what it takes either.” – We have enough critics.  Be an encourager.  One sincere word of encouragement after failure is worth more than a day of praise after success.  So start cheering for the people around you.  Not only will they feel empowered, but also what goes around comes around, and sooner or later the people you’re cheering for will start cheering for you too.
13. “I don’t have time for anyone else.” – One of the most spiritual things you can do is embrace your humanity.  Connect with those around you today.  Say, “I love you,” “I apologize,” “I appreciate you,” “I’m proud of you”… whatever you’re feeling.  Send random emails and texts, write a friendly note, embrace your truth and share it.  Create a smile today for someone else… and give plenty of hugs.  This connectedness will strengthen you.
14. “My closest relationships can wait.” – If you never stop to enjoy who’s beside you, someday you’ll realize you’ve wasted all your years looking for something, a sort of trophy you think you’ll get only if you really, really do enough to deserve it.  But then one day you’ll wake up and not want it anymore; you’ll want something else, something warm and sheltering, something you can turn to, regardless of what you do, regardless of who you have ultimately become.  Something that will just be there, always, like tomorrow’s morning sky.  And the only way to create this “something” is to nurture the amazing people in your life.
15. “I can break my promise just this once.” – Be committed.  Commitment means staying loyal and keeping your promises, long after the time and mood you made the promises in has left you.  Doing so is vital to relationships and long-term success in every imaginable walk of life.
16.  “One little lie couldn’t hurt.” – Lying is a vicious disease.  It spreads quickly.  And liars are the only people who expect acknowledgment for being honest.  Don’t be one of them.  Don’t lie.  Do the right thing, even if you are the only one who knows.
17. “They care about me, but they are just too busy to keep their promises.” – It may be hard to accept, but when you are important to another person, they will always find a way to make time for you – no excuses, no lies, and no broken promises.
18.  “I refuse to cry.” – We need never be ashamed of our tears.  Do not apologize or feel ashamed for crying.  Without this emotion, you are only a robot.  Crying is one of the highest devotional songs.  The ones who know crying, know what it means to be spiritual.  If you can cry with a pure heart – through forgiveness and acceptance – nothing else compares to such a prayer.  Crying includes all the core principles of humanity.  (ReadDaring Greatly.)
19.  “I refuse to forgive.” – Forgive the past.  It’s over.  Learn from it and let go.  People and situations are constantly growing and changing.  Do not cling to a limited, disconnected, negative image of a person or time in the past.  See your life now.  Your relationships and circumstances are always alive and changing.
20.  “My heart has been broken too many times to take new risks.” – Sometimes it takes a heartbreak or a major letdown to shake us awake and help us see we are worth so much more than we are settling for.  Will letting go be hard?  Sure, but not nearly as hard as holding on to something that wasn’t real.  You have to put your heart out there.  Because the emotions that can break your heart are oftentimes the very ones that heal it and help it grow.

The floor is yours…

Truth be told, it is ultimately only our own thoughts that hurt us.

So think about it: What negative thoughts and destructive thinking patterns do you struggle with?

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How To Find A Good Friend

 How To Find A Good Friend

Here are some ideas on how to go about finding that special person.

Method 1 of 3: Putting Yourself Out There

1. 1
   Take the initiative. When it comes to finding a true friend, you can't afford to be lazy. A real friend won't just magically materialize on your doorstep, so you need to be willing to put some work in. Take matters into your own hands and start socializing.
   

   • Stop waiting for other people to do the work for you. Call people up and ask if you can hang out with them, or organize an event yourself.
   • Don't worry about seeming desperate or needy. Focus on you and your goal. If it all works out in the end, then who cares?
2. 2
   Meet new people. You won't make friends by sitting at home alone every night. You need to be proactive, so force yourself out of the house and meet as many people as possible. It might be intimidating at first, but it'll be worth it in the end.
   

   • One of the easiest ways to meet people is through friends you already have. Tag along to a party or social event and get your friend to make the introductions.
   • Meet people through hobbies or classes. Friends are generally people that you share a common interest with, so the people you meet through hobbies or classes are excellent potential friend material.
   • Meet people through work. You might have a work colleague who you feel a connection with, but you've never hung out socially. Now is the time.
   • Meet people online. Sometimes there's a stigma attached to meeting people online, but it can be a genuinely great way to meet people. Blogging, social networking and posting on online forums are all perfectly viable ways of socializing.
3. 3
   Don't be oversensitive. Meeting people for the first time can be tough. They may seem disinterested or unwilling to make an effort. Or else you might hit it off instantly, but you never hear from them again. Don't be disheartened. Finding a true friend takes time.
4. 4
   Don't be picky. Keep an open mind about who you hang out with. When you're trying to make friends, being picky is not a good strategy. Your initial goal is to meet as many people as possible, so talk to everybody and keep an open mind.
   

   • Even if you meet someone who looks or seems like someone you'd have nothing in common with, talk to them and give them a chance.
   • You're not going to know a true friend at first sight - you'll have to get to know them first - so consider every possibility!
5. 5
   Be persistent. Even if your first attempt at putting yourself out there isn't as successful as you had hoped, don't despair! People can take a little while to warm up, so the second or third time meeting someone might go a lot better than the first.
   

   • If you invite someone to hang out, don't be upset if they can't make it. Chances are they have a genuine excuse, it's not because they don't like you. Give it a week or two, then ask again.
   • Sometimes it just won't work out with someone and that's okay. Consider it a practice run for when you meet the real deal.
6. 6
   Be patient. It takes time to really get to know someone, especially when you're looking for true friendship. If you continue to put yourself out there and make an effort to hang out with as many people as possible, eventually you'll find someone you genuinely connect with.
   

   • Be realistic about how much time it'll take to really get to know someone. Sure, you might hit it off and feel like you've known someone for ten years rather than ten minutes, but usually it'll take much longer, depending on how often you hang out.
   • In the right situations, you can make new friends very quickly - like when you start college, move to a new city, or join a sports teams.

Method 2 of 3: Getting to Know One Another

1. 1
   Start a conversation. The first step in getting to know a potential friend is to strike up a conversation. Find out a little bit about them and their interests. Once you get started on an interesting topic, the rest will come naturally.
   

   • Try making a general comment or asking a question about something generic, just to break the ice. For example, "Great party, huh?" or "How do you know John?"
   • Try to listen more than you talk. Show that you're interested in what they have to say.
   • Find out about their interests and hobbies. If you can find something you have in common, the conversation will flow more freely.
2. 2
   Get their contact information. If you hit it off with someone, make sure to get their contact information before you part ways, you'll need it if you want to organize to meet up with them again.
   

   • Get their phone number or email address, or ask if they're on Facebook. It doesn't matter as long as you have a way of reaching out to them.
   • Be sure to give them your contact details too. They might just invite you to do something fun.
3. 3
   Invite them to hang out. Here is where a lot of people falter. It's fine to meet people once and make friends with them on Facebook afterwards, but you won't develop a true friendship unless you take the next step and invite them to hang out.
   

   • You don't need to invite them to do anything special, just ask them if they'd like to go for a drink or hang out at the beach.
   • Even if they can't make it, they'll probably be flattered you asked. Try again in a week or so.
4. 4
   Accept every invitation. It's good to make your own plans to meet up with people, but if you get an invitation it's even better. Think of it as an easy opportunity to get to know someone better or meet more people.
   

   • Accept every invitation that's thrown your way, even if it's to see a movie you're not interested in or to play a sport you don't like. Once you're there, you will be glad that you made the effort.
   • You don't want to get a reputation as the person who never shows up for anything. That's a surefire way to never get invited anywhere.
5. 5
   Give the relationship time to grow. Deep, meaningful relationships don't just blossom overnight - you need to nurture them and allow them time to mature.
   

   • Once you've made the initial steps and established a routine of hanging out, just repeat, repeat, repeat.
   • To become a true friend with someone, you need to hang out fairly often, keep in touch, enjoy good times together, and get to know each other on a deeper level.

Method 3 of 3: What To Look For in a True Friend

1. 1
   Look for someone you can have fun with. A true friend is someone that you have a great time with. You should be able to make your own fun, laugh together, get in trouble, and genuinely enjoy one another's company.
2. 2
   Look for someone who will be honest with you. A true friend will always be honest with you, no matter what. It doesn't matter whether it's about something trivial, like whether your outfit looks good on you, or something life-altering, like if they found out that your partner is cheating on you. A true friend will never keep you in the dark.
3. 3
   Look for someone who will be loyal to you. A true friend will be fiercely loyal to you, whether you're present or not. This means that they'll stand by you, even if they don't agree with your decisions and stick up for you when nobody else will.
4. 4
   Look for someone trustworthy. You can trust a true friend with anything, whether it's to feed your cat while you're on vacation or to keep your deepest, darkest secrets.
5. 5
   Look for someone dependable. A true friend is there when you need them, to share the good times and help you through the bad ones. They return your phone calls. They show up to the lame double date you made them agree to. They don't go M.I.A. when the going gets tough.
6. 6
   Look for someone supportive. A true friend is supportive of you and your goals. They won't try to change you, make you feel uncomfortable or try to hold you back. They encourage you to be your very best

            Tips

• Express who you are! Don't pretend to like something or be someone you're not. Don't lie to sound impressive.
• A true friendship is hard to come by. It's a gift to have that kind of bond with someone. Don't push and try to make it happen with someone you don't get along well with, and if you do find it- keep it!
• Do not force friendship.
• Express yourself! Nothing says "let's hang out" like having everyone know who you are. Like Switchfoot? Wear a band T-shirt. Into Buffy? Wear a T-shirt again. You get the idea.
• Be yourself. You don't need to change for people to like you.

Warnings

• If you're chatting online, never try and meet up in person unless you're absolutely sure that this person is legitimate. It's hard to tell, but be extraordinarily cautious. This means not meeting someone in person right away, wait a year. If you do meet- always meet in a very public place where there is security. Also, bring a trusted friend.
• Never give out your personal information online.
• Not all people will be willing to be your friend, so just move on.     

***Sources and Citations=

http://www.succeedsocially.com/sociallife http://www.succeedsocially.com/deepenfriendship

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How To Save Your Money

How To Save Your Money

Start with Step 1 below to learn how to set realistic goals, keep your spending in check, and get the greatest long-term benefit for your

zsmoney.Part 1 of 3: Saving Money Responsibly

1. 1
   Pay yourself first.The easiest way to save money rather than spending it is to make sure that that you never get a chance to spend the money in the first place. Arranging for a portion of each paycheck to be deposited directly into a savings account or a retirement account takes the stress and tedium out of the process of deciding how much money to save and how much to keep for yourself each month — basically, you save automatically and the money you keep each month is yours to spend as you please. Over time, depositing even a small portion of each paycheck into your savings can add up (especially when you take interest into account) so start as soon as you can for maximum benefit.
   

   • To set up an automatic deposit, talk to the payroll staff at your job (or, if your employer uses one, your third-party payroll service). If you can provide account information for a savings account separate from your basic checking account, you should generally be able to set up a direct deposit scheme with no problems.
   • If for some reason you can't set up an automatic deposit for each paycheck (like if you support yourself with freelance work or are paid mostly in cash), decide on a specific cash amount to manually deposit into a savings account each month and stick to this goal.
2. 2
   Avoid accumulating new debt. Some debt is essentially unavoidable. For instance, only the very rich have enough money to buy a house in one lump sum payment, yet millions of people are able to buy houses by taking out loans and slowly paying them back. However, in general, when you can avoid going into debt, do so. Paying a sum of money up-front is always cheaper in the long run than paying off an equivalent loan while interest accumulates over time.
   

   • If taking out a loan is unavoidable, try to make as big of down payment as possible. The more of the cost of the purchase you can cover up front, the quicker you'll pay off your loan and the less you'll spend on interest.
   • While everyone's financial situation differs, most banks recommend that your debt payments should be about 10% of your pretax income, while anything under 20% is considered healthy. About 36% is seen as an "upper limit" for reasonable amounts of debt.
3. 3
   Set reasonable savings goals. It's a lot easier to save if you know you have something to save for. Set yourself savings goals that are within your reach to motivate yourself to make the tough financial decisions needed to save responsibly. For serious goals like buying a house or retiring, your goals may take years or decades to achieve. In these cases, it's important to monitor your progress on a regular basis. Only by stepping back and taking a look at the big picture can you get a sense for how far you've come and how far you have left to go.
   

   • Big goals, like retirement, take a very long time to achieve. In the time needed to reach these goals, financial markets are likely to be different than they are today. You may need to spend some time researching the predicted future state of the market before setting your goal. For instance, if you're in your prime earning years, most financial commentators say that you'll need about 60-85% of your currently yearly income to maintain your current lifestyle each year you're retired.
4. 4
   Establish a time-frame for your goals. Giving yourself ambitious (but reasonable) time limits for achieving your goals can be a great motivational tool. For example, let's say that you set a goal of being on your way to owning a house two years from today. In this case, you'd need to investigate the average home cost in the area you'd like to live in and start saving for the down payment on your new house (as a general rule, down payments are often required to be no less than 20% of the purchase price of the house).
   

   • So, in our example, if houses in the area you're looking at are about $300,000 apiece, you'll need to come up with at least 300,000 × 20% = $60,000 in two years. Depending on how much you make, this may or may not be feasible.
   • Setting time frames is especially important for essential short-term goals. For instance, if your car's transmission needs to be replaced, but you can't afford the new transmission, you'll want to save up the money for the replacement as quickly as possible to ensure you're not left without a way to get to work. An ambitious but reasonable time frame can help you achieve this goal. 
   5
   Keep a budget. It's easy to commit to ambitious savings goals, but if you don't have any way to keep track of your expenses, you'll find that it's difficult to achieve them. To keep your financial progress on-track, try budgeting out your income at the beginning of each month. Assigning a set portion of your income to all of your major expenses ahead of time can help ensure that you don't waste money, especially if you actually divide each paycheck according to your budget as soon as you get it.
   

   • For instance, on an income of $3,000 per month, we might budget as follows:

     • Housing/utilities: $1,000

       Student loans: $300

       Food: $500

       Internet: $70

       Gasoline: $150

       Savings: $500

       Misc.: $200

       Luxuries: $280 

5. 6
   Record your expenses. Keeping a tight budget is a must for anyone looking to save money, but if you don't keep track of your expenses, you may find that it's difficult to stick to your goals. Keeping a running tally of how much you've spent on various types of expenses each month can help you identify "problem" areas and adjust your spending habits to fit your budget. However, keeping track of your expenses can require a serious attention to detail. While everyone should keep track of major expenses like housing and debt repayment, the amount of attention you devote to minor expenses generally increases with the seriousness of your financial situations.
   

   • It can be handy to keep a small notebook with you at all times. Get in the habit of recording every expense and saving your receipts (especially for major purchases). When you can, enter your expenses in a larger notebook or a spreadsheet program for your long-term records.
   • Note that, today, there are many apps you can download to your phone that can help you keep track of your expenses (some of which are free).
   • If you have serious spending problems, don't be afraid to save every single receipt. At the end of the month, divide your receipts into categories, then tally each up. You may be shocked how much money you spend on purchases that are far from essential. 
6. 7
   Start saving as early as possible. Money that's squirreled away in savings accounts usually accumulates interest at a set percentage rate. The longer your money remains in the savings account, the more interest you accumulate. Thus, it's in your advantage to start saving as soon as you possibly can. Even if you're only able to contribute a tiny amount to your savings each month when you're in your twenties, do so. Relatively small amounts of cash left in interest-yielding accounts for long periods of time can eventually accumulate to several times their initial value.
   

   • For example, let's say that, by working a low-paying job during your twenties, you eventually save up $10,000 and put this money into a high-yield account with a 4% annual interest rate. Over 5 years, this will earn you about $2,166.53. However, if you had put this money away one year earlier, you would have made about $500 more by the same point in time without any extra effort — a small but not insignificant bonus.
7. 8
   Consider contributing to a retirement account. During the years when you're young, energetic, and healthy, retirement can seem so far away that it's almost not worth even thinking about. By the time you're older and begin to lose steam, it can be all that you think about. Unless you're one of the lucky few who stand to inherit serious wealth, saving for retirement is something you'll need to think about once you establish a stable career — the sooner, the better. As noted above, though almost everyone's situation is different, it's wise to plan on having about 60-85% of your yearly income available to maintain your current standard of living for each year that you are retired.
   

   • If you haven't already done so, talk to your employer about the possibility of contributing to a 401(k). These retirement accounts allow you to automatically deposit a set amount of each paycheck in the account, making saving easy. Additionally, the money you deposit into a 401(k) is often not subject to the same taxes as the rest of the money in your paycheck. Finally, many employers offer proportional matching programs with their 401(k) services, meaning that they'll match a certain perentage of each payment.
   • As of 2014, the maximum amount of money you are allowed to place in a 401(k) per year is $17,500.
8. 9
   Make stock market investments cautiously. If you've been saving responsibly and have a little extra money at your disposal, investing in the stock market can be a lucrative (but risky) opportunity to make extra money. Before investing in stocks, it's important to understand that any money you invest in the stock market can potentially be lost for good, especially if you don't know what you're doing, so don't use this as a method for long-term saving. Instead, treat the stock market as a chance to essentially make educated gambles with money you can stand to lose. In general, most people don't need to invest in the stock market at all to responsibly save for retirement.
9. 10
   Don't get discouraged. When you're having trouble saving money, it's easy to lose your nerve. Your situation may seem hopeless — it may seem almost impossible to save up the money you need to meet your long-term goals. However, no matter how little you're starting with, it's always possible to begin saving money. The sooner you start, the sooner you can be on your way to financial security.
   

   • If you're discouraged about your financial situation, consider talking to a financial counseling service. These agencies, which often operate for free or very cheap, exist to help you begin saving so that you can meet your financial goals. The National Foundation for Credit Counseling (NFCC), a non-profit organization, is a great place to start.

Part 2 of 3: Cutting Expenses

1. 1
   Remove luxuries from your budget. If you're having trouble saving money, it's wise to start here. Many of the expenses that we take for granted are far from essential. Eliminating luxury expenses is a great first step to improve your financial situation because this won't impact your quality of life or your ability to perform your work significantly. While it can be difficult to imagine life without a gas-guzzling car and a cable TV subscription, you may be surprised how easy it is to live without these things once you remove them from your life. Below are a just a few easy ways to reduce your luxury expenses:
   

   • Unsubscribe from optional television or internet packages.
   • Switch to a thriftier service plan for your phone.
   • Trade in an expensive car for one that is fuel-efficient and cheap to maintain.
   • Sell any electronic gadgets going unused.
   • Buy clothing and home furnishings from thrift stores.
2. 2
   Find cheaper housing. For most people, costs related to housing make up the single biggest expense in their budget. Because of this, saving money housing can free up a substantial amount of your income for other important activities, like saving for retirement. While it's not always easy to change your living situation, you'll want to seriously re-examine your housing situation if you're having a hard time balancing your budget.
   

   • If you're renting, you may want to try negotiating with your landlord for a cheaper rent. Since most landlords want to avoid the risk that comes with looking for new tenants, you may be able to get a better deal if you have a good history with your landlord. If need to, you may be able to exchange work (like gardening or maintaining the house) for cheaper rent.
   • If you are paying a mortgage, talk to your lender about refinancing your loan. You may be able to negotiate for a better deal if you're in good standing. When refinancing, try to keep the repayment schedule as short as possible.
   • You may also want to consider moving to a cheaper housing market altogether. According to a recent study, the cheapest housing markets in the U.S. are in Detroit, Michigan; Lake County, Michigan; Cleveland, Ohio; Palm Bay, Florida; and Toledo, Ohio.
3. 3
   Eat for cheap. Many people spend much more on food than is necessary. While it's easy to forget to be thrifty when you're biting into a gourmet meal at your favorite restaurant, food-related expenses can become quite large if allowed to get out of control. In general, buying in bulk is cheaper in the long run than buying small quantities of food — consider getting a membership at a warehouse retailer like Costco if your food expenses are high. Buying individual meals at restaurants is the most expensive option of all, so making an effort to eat in rather than eat out can also save you lots of cash.
   

   • Pick cheap, nutritious foods. Rather than buying prepared, processed foods, try checking out the fresh food and produce aisles of your local grocery store. You may be surprised how cheap it is to eat healthy! For instance, brown rice, a filling, nutritious food, can come in large, twenty-pound sacks for less than a dollar per pound.
   • Take advantage of discounts. Many grocery stores (especially large chains) give out coupons and discounts at the check-out counter. Don't let these go to waste!
   • If you frequently go out to eat, stop. It's generally much cheaper to cook a meal at home than it is to order an equivalent dish in a restaurant. Regularly cooking your own food also teaches you a valuable skill you can use to entertain friends, satisfy your family, and even attract romantic interests.
   • Don't be afraid to take advantage of local free food resources if your situation is serious. Food banks, soup kitchens, and shelters can all provide meals for free to those in need. If you need help, contact your local Department of Social Services for more information.
4. 4
   Reduce your energy usage. Most people accept the price on their utility bill each month without question. In fact, it's possible to greatly reduce your energy usage (and thus your monthly bill) with just a few simple steps. These tricks are so easy that there's practically no reason to avoid them if you're looking to save money. Best of all, reducing the amount of energy you use also reduces the amount of pollution you indirectly produce, minimizing your impact on the global environment.
   

   • Turn off the lights when you're not around. There's no reason to leave the lights on if you're not in the room (or in the house), so flip them off when you leave. Try leaving a sticky note by the door if you're having a hard time remembering.
   • Avoid using heating and A/C when it's not essential. To stay cool, open your windows or use a small personal fan. To stay warm, wear several layers of clothing, wear a blanket, or use a space heater.
   • Invest in good insulation. If you can afford to pay for a substantial home improvement project, replacing old, leaky insulation in your walls with high-efficiency modern insulation can save you money in the long run by keeping your house's warm or cool internal air from escaping.
   • If you can, invest in solar panels. As a serious investment in your own future (as well as the planet's), solar panels are the way to go. Though the up-front cost can be quite high, solar technology becomes cheaper with each passing year.
5. 5
   Use cheaper forms of transportation. Owning, maintaining, and running a car can eat up a large portion of your income. Depending on how much you drive, fuel can cost you hundred of dollars per month. On top of this, your car will also cost you in licensing fees and maintenance expenses. Instead of driving, use a cheap (or free) alternative option instead. Not only will this save you money, but also potentially allow you to spend extra time exercising and cut down on the stress from your daily commute.
   

   • Investigate public transit options near you. Depending on where you live, you may have a variety of cheap options for public transit at your disposal. Most big cities will have metro, subway, or streetcar lines running in and out of the city, while mid-sized towns can have bus or train systems for you to use.
   • Consider walking or biking to work. If you live close enough to your job for this to be feasible, both are excellent ways to get to work for free while simultaneously getting fresh air and exercise.
   • If taking a car is unavoidable, consider carpooling. Doing this allows you to share fuel and maintenance expenses with the other members of the carpool. Plus, you'll have someone to talk to during your commute.
6. 6
   Have fun for cheap (or free). While reducing your personal expenses can mean cutting frivolous luxuries out of your life, you don't necessarily have to stop having fun if you're trying to save money. Changing your leisure habits and recreational activities to more affordable ones allows you to strike the perfect balance between fun and responsibility. You may be amazed at the amount of fun you can have for just a few dollars if you're resourceful!
   

   • Keep up-to-speed on community events. Today, most towns and cities will have an online events calendar listing upcoming events in the local area. Often, events put on by the local government or community associations will be cheap or even free. For instance, in a medium-sized town, it's often possible to explore free art exhibitions, see movies in a local park, and attend donation-based community rallies.
   • Read. Compared to movies and video games, books are cheap (especially if you buy them at a used bookstore). Good books can be absolutely captivating, allowing you to experience life through the eyes of exciting characters or learn new things you might otherwise never have encountered.
   • Enjoy cheap activities with friends. There are almost no end to the amount of things you can do with your friends that require little or no money. For instance, try going on a hike, playing a board game, catching an old movie at a cheap second-run theater, exploring part of town you've never been to, or playing sports.
7. 7
   Avoid expensive addictions. Certain bad habits can put a serious damper on your efforts to save money. In worst-case scenarios, these habits can become serious addictions which are almost impossible to defeat without help. Worse yet, many of these addictions can be extremely hazardous to your health in the long term. Save your wallet (and your body) the trouble of going through these addictions by avoiding them in the first place.
   

   • Don't smoke. Today, the harmful effects of smoking are well-known. Lung cancer, heart disease, stroke, and a variety of other serious illnesses are known to be caused by smoking.On top this, cigarettes are expensive — depending on where you live, up to about $14 per pack.
   • Don't drink excessively. While a drink or two with friends won't hurt you, regular heavy drinking can cause serious problems in the long run, like liver disease, impaired mental function, weight gain, delirium, and even death.In addition, nursing an alcohol addiction can be a massive financial burden.
   • Don't do addictive drugs. Drugs like heroin, cocaine, and methamphetamine are extremely addictive and can have a variety of seriously harmful (even lethal) effects on your health and can be much more expensive than alcohol and tobacco. For instance, country musician Waylon Jennings is purported to at one point have spent over $1,500 per day on his cocaine habit.

Part 3 of 3: Spending Money Intelligently

1. 1
   Spend money on absolute essentials first. When it comes to spending money, there are some things that you absolutely, positively cannot do without. These things (namely, food, water, housing, and clothing) are your first priority when it comes to spending your cash. Obviously, if you become homeless or suffer from starvation, it becomes very, very difficult to meet the rest of your financial goals, so you'll want to ensure that you have enough money to cover these bare minimum requirements before devoting money to anything else.
   

   • However, just because things like food, water, and shelter are important doesn't necessarily mean that you have to splurge on them. For instance, cutting down on the amount that you go out to eat is one easy way to drastically reduce your food expenses. Along the same lines, moving to an area with cheap rent or home prices is a great way to spend less on housing.
   • Depending on where you live, housing costs can eat up a large chunk of your income. In general, most experts recommend against agreeing to any housing arrangement that will cost more than one-third of your income.^[12]
2. 2
   Next, save for an emergency fund. If you don't already have an emergency fund with enough money in it so that you can survive if you suddenly lose your income, begin contributing to one immediately. Having a reasonable amount of money stockpiled in a secure savings account gives you the freedom to comfortably sort out your affairs in the event that you lose your job. After you cover your essentials, you'll want to devote a chunk of your income to building up this savings account until you have enough saved to cover about 3-6 months of living expenses.
   

   • Note that living expenses can vary based on the local financial climate. While it's possible to survive on $1,500 for a few months in Detroit or Phoenix, this might not even pay one month's rent for a cheap apartment in New York City. If you live in an expensive area, your emergency fund will naturally need to bigger.
   • Besides giving you the peace of mind of knowing that you'll be OK in the event of career difficulties, having an emergency fund can also earn you money in the long run. If you lose your job and youdon't have an emergency fund, you may be forced to take the very first job you're offered, even if it doesn't pay well. On the other hand, if you can survive without working for a while, you can afford to be much pickier and potentially land a better-paying job.
3. 3
   Next, pay off your debt. Left unchecked, debt can seriously derail your efforts to save money. If you're only making the minimum payments on your debt, you'll end up paying much more over the life of the loan than if you had paid it off more quickly. Save money in the long-term by devoting a good chunk of your income to debt payment so that you can pay off your debt as quickly as possible. As a general rule, paying off your highest-interest loans first is the most effective use of your money.
   

   • Once you've covered your essentials and built up a reasonable-sized emergency fund, you can safely devote almost all of your extra income to paying off your debt. On the other hand, if you don't have an emergency fund, you may have to split your extra income up so that you use a portion to pay off your debt each month while simultaneously diverting some into your emergency fund.
   • If you have multiple sources of debt that are proving overwhelming, look into consolidating your debts. It may be possible to roll all of your debts into one loan with a lower interest rate. It's important to note, however, that the repayment schedules for these consolidated loans can be longer than those for your initial debt.
   • You may also want to try negotiating with your lender directly for a lower interest rate. It's not in your lender's best interest to let you go into bankruptcy, so s/he may agree to a lower interest rate in order to allow you to pay off the loan.
4. 4
   Put away money next. If you've established an emergency fund and paid off all (or nearly all) of your debt, you'll probably want to start putting your extra money in a savings account. The money you save this way is different from your emergency fund — whereas you'll want to avoid dipping into your emergency fund unless you absolutely have to, your normal savings are available for big, important purchases, like repairs to the car you use to drive to work. However, in general, you'll want to avoid using your savings so that, over time, your total savings grow. If you can, try to devote at least 10 -15% of your monthly income to your savings starting in your 20s — most experts agree that this is a healthy goal.
   

   • When you get paid, it can be tempting to immediately make an impulse buy. To avoid this, deposit your savings into an account as soon as you get paid. For instance, if you're trying to save 10% of your income and you get a paycheck for $710.68, immediately deposit 10% (find this by moving the decimal point one space to the left), or $71.07. This practice can help you avoid unnecessary spending and accumulate a good amount of money over the years.
   • An even better idea is to automate as much of the saving process as possible so that you don't even have the tempting money to begin with. For instance, talk to your employer about setting up an automatic deposit system through your bank or with a third-party app. This way, you can transfer a set amount or percentage of each paycheck to a checking or savings account without having to make any extra effort.
5. 5
   Next, spend on smart non-essentials. If, after adding a healthy amount of your income to your savings each month, you have extra money left over, you should consider making certain non-essential investments that can improve your productivity, earning potential, and quality of life in the long run. While these types of purchases aren't essential in the way that food, water, and housing are, they are smart long-term choices that can end up saving you money over time.
   

   • For example, buying an ergonomic chair to sit in while you work isn't absolutely essential, but it is a smart long-term choice because it allows you to do more work while minimizing back pain (which, coincidentally, can be expensive to treat if it develops into a serious problem). Another example is replacing your home's old, troublesome water heater. While the old one may have sufficed in the short term, buying a new one means you won't have to spend money on repairs when the old one breaks, saving money in the long run.
   • Other examples include purchases that allow you to get to work for cheaper, like monthly or yearly public transit passes, tools that help you work more effectively, like a phone headset if you're in a job that occupies your hands, and purchases that make it easier for you to work, like posture-improving gel inserts for your shoes.
6. 6
   Spend on luxuries last. Saving money isn't all about living hard and lean. When you've paid off your debt, established an emergency fund, and spent money on smart purchases that pay off in the long term, it's OK to spend a little money on yourself. Healthy, responsible luxury spending is one way to stay sane while working hard, so don't be afraid to celebrate getting your financial situation in order with a reasonable luxury purchase.
   

   • Luxuries include anything that's not an essential good or service and provides little or no long-term benefit. This broad category can include things like trips to expensive restaurants, vacations, new vehicles, cable television, pricey gadgets, and much more.

     Tips

     • Always over-estimate your expenses and under-estimate your income.
     • Take care of your possessions. In this way, you'll need to replace items less. Also, don't replace items until it's absolutely necessary. For instance, just because a motor in an electric toothbrush breaks doesn't mean it stops functioning as a toothbrush. Continue to use it, and when ready go buy a new one or check the warranty.
     • Make purchases with paper money, not exact change, and always save the change. Use a piggy bank or jar for your coins. Coins and change may look insignificant but when accumulated over time they can help you save. Some banks now offer free coin counting machines. When you redeem your coins, ask to be paid by check so you won't be tempted to spend your new found cash.
     • Every time you go to buy something think of the thing you are saving for and the rough percentage of your savings so far that the thing costs and quite often you won't buy it.
     • If you get paid about the same amount on a regular basis, it'll get easier to budget your money over time. If you have a variable income, it'll be harder to anticipate your expenses because you won't know when's the next time you'll get paid. List your budget categories in order of importance and fulfill the most important items first. Play it safe; assume it'll be a while before you get money again.
     • Use affirmations. For example, repeat this affirmation to yourself until it sinks in: Debt is not an option.
     • If you receive unexpected cash, put all or most of it into your savings, but continue to set aside your regularly scheduled amount as well. You’ll reach your savings goals sooner.
     • Even if you REALLY want something, ask yourself, do you REALLY need this? More than half of the time it will be a big no.
     • Most people can save something regardless of their income. Starting to save a little will help build the habit of saving. Even saving as little as $5 a month will teach you that you don't need as much money as you think.
     • If you can't bring yourself to destroy all your credit cards, at least freeze them. Put them in a container, fill it with water, and stick it in a freezer. That way, if you feel the urge to use credit, you have to wait until the ice melts, and during that time you may come to your senses and realize you don't really need to buy what you wanted to buy.

     Show 5 more tips

     Warnings
     • If you do mess up don't beat yourself up about it. Just try to do better the next time you get paid.
     • After a long week of working, you may want to indulge in some luxury, telling yourself, "I deserve this". Remember that the things you buy are not gifts to yourself; they are trades, products for money. Say, "Of course I deserve this, but can I afford it? If I can't afford it, I'm still a worthy person, and I still deserve to meet my savings goals!"
     • Do not go out "window shopping" with any money on you. You will only be tempted to spend money you cannot afford to lose. Only shop with a predetermined shopping list.
     • Unless you're in truly desperate financial straits (like 10 seconds from eviction and your three children are starving) don't try to cut corners connected to health. Basic preventative care for yourself, your family, and your pets might cost you a $60 office visit or a $30 heart-worm pill today, but the skipping it will contribute to expensive problems and heartache down the road.
     • If you have spendthrifts in your circle of friends, you may need to formulate a list of ready excuses to explain why you can’t go out with them all the time.

     Sources and Citations

     1. ↑ http://budgeting.thenest.com/much-should-pay-debt-monthly-21660.html
     2. ↑ http://www.fool.com/Retirement/RetirementPlanning/retirementplanning03.htm
     3. ↑ https://www.bankofamerica.com/home-loans/mortgage/budgeting-for-home/mortgage-down-payment-amount.go?request_locale=en_US
     4. ↑ http://www.consumerismcommentary.com/401k-contribution-limits/
     5. ↑ http://online.wsj.com/news/articles/SB10001424052970204795304577221052377253224
     6. ↑ http://www.nfcc.org/
     7. ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/25/cheapest-housing-markets-america_n_5028657.html
     8. ↑ http://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/data_statistics/fact_sheets/health_effects/effects_cig_smoking/
     9. ↑ http://www.ibtimes.com/price-cigarettes-how-much-does-pack-cost-each-us-state-map-1553445
     10. ↑ http://www.timberlineknolls.com/alcohol-addiction/signs-effects
     11. ↑ http://www.gactv.com/gac/ar_artists_a-z/article/0,,GAC_26071_4745541,00.html
     12. ↑ http://www.nefe.org/press-room/news/financial-four-is-set/experts-rank-top-financial-priorities.aspx
     13. ↑ http://money.cnn.com/retirement/guide/basics_basics.moneymag/index7.htm

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For Those Who Work A Lot

For those who work a lot and have children or plan to have children

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door. 
SON: "Daddy, may I ask you something?" 
DAD: "Yeah, sure, what is it?" 
SIN: "Daddy, how much do you make an hour?" 
DAD: "That does not concern you. Why do you ask?" says angrily
SON: "I just wanted to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?"
DAD: "If you must know, I make $ 50 an hour."
"Oh," the little boy replied, with his head down.
"Dad, please and, can you lend me $ 25? "
The father was furious: "If the only reason you askedto lend you $ 25 that you can buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then turn around and go straight to the room and think about why you are being so selfish. I do not work hard everyday for such childish frivolities "
The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.
The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy questions ... "How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?"
After some hour, had calmed down, and started to think: "Maybe there was something he really needed to buy those $ 25 ... really did not ask for money very often ..."
The man went to his room and opened the door.
"Are you asleep, son?" he asked.
"No, Dad, I'm awake," replied the boy.
"I was thinking ... maybe I was too hard on you earlier. I had a tough day and took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $ 25 you asked for. "
The boy sat straight up, smiling: "Oh, thank you daddy!" he yelled.
Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up novčanica.Kad he saw that the boy already had money, again began ljutiti.Dječak slowly counted out his money and looked at his father.
"Why do you want more money if you already have some?" the father grumbled.
"Because I did not have enough, but now I do.", replied the boy.
"Dad , I have $ 50. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I want to have dinner with you. " 
The father was crushed. He hugged his son and asked him for forgiveness. This is just a short reminder to all of you. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with people who really matter to us, those close to our heart. 
Remember to share that $ 50 with someone you love. If we die tomorrow, the company that you work for can easily replaced you. But family and friends we leave behind will feel the loss for life.

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Modern risk

Modern risk

"No one is doing anything, and this is a dangerous epidemic of obesity, alcoholism and smoking '

Loneliness and social isolation destroys health worse than obesity, smoking, alcoholism, showed extensive research on the three million people. Worse still, nobody does anything.

While the last 10 years or so, there's big talk about the harmfulness of overweight and sedentary lifestyle, driven campaign which seeks to encourage exercise and even introduce taxes on fat and sugar, usaljenost even the World Health Organization is not considered a threat. 

However, a drastic increase in depression and anxiety disorders is becoming epidemic. Dr. Julianne Holt-Lunstad warns that we must begin to really understand their social relations. Even if not completed suicide. "Loneliness destroys health worse than alcohol, 15 cigarettes a day or obesity," warns Dr. Holt Lunstad . He added that in developed countries, more and more people live and only less communicating with people. 

But the study showed the bright side of the psyche - how loneliness destroys health, so it protects socializing. For example, people who every day hanging out with friends and family are less like to have harmful effects of stress.

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